Chrissy Teigen Diagnosed With Postpartum Depression & Anxiety

Motherhood can be a difficult experience, especially when you suffer from postpartum depression and anxiety. That was the case for Chrissy Teigen, who gave birth to her daughter, Luna Simone last April. The model and TV host penned a revealing essay on how her life changed after she and husband John Legend became parents.

You would never imagine her suffering since she’s always pictured smiling and joking with her husband on social media, but postpartum is something that many women hide, and some do it very well. “Getting out of bed to get to set on time was painful. My lower back throbbed; my shoulders—even my wrists—hurt. I didn’t have an appetite. I would go two days without a bite of food, and you know how big of deal food is for me,” says Teigen to Glamour.

Postpartum symptoms can vary from mother to mother and the list is quite extensive. One of the symptoms is that women find themselves being more moody and emotional and that can make ordinary tasks more challenging.

“One thing that really got me was just how short I was with people. I would be in my dressing room, sitting in a robe, getting hair and makeup done, and a crew member would knock on the door and ask: ‘Chrissy, do you know the lyrics of the song?’ And I would lose it. Or ‘Chrissy, do you like these cat ears, or these panda hands?’ And I’d be like: ‘Whatever you want. I don’t care.’ They would leave. My eyes would well up, and I would burst into tears. My makeup artist would pat them dry and give me a few minutes.” Teigen shares.

“I couldn’t figure out why I was so unhappy. I blamed it on being tired and possibly growing out of the role. ‘Maybe I’m just not a goofy person anymore. Maybe I’m just supposed to be a mom.’”

Most women who suffer from postpartum don’t want to leave the house or their new baby. Many feel so overwhelmed that they forget to shower, to eat, and even sleep.

“When I wasn’t in the studio, I never left the house. I mean never. Not even a tiptoe outside. I’d ask people who came inside why they were wet. Was it raining? How would I know—I had every shade closed,” she says.

She had a spot on the couch where she would lay and her husband would sleep on the couch with her, sometimes four nights in a row. Teigen even kept robes and comfy clothes in the pantry so she wouldn’t have to go upstairs and there was a lot of spontaneous crying.